Blame · it · on · a · rush · of · blood · to · the · head..

3 MORE HOURS UNTIL I GO TO CHICAGO! :) :)

Anyone want to help me define "life goes on.."? i have my ideas but I need some help!

Happy Valentine's Day! By the sounds of it mostly everyone had a great day. As much as i wish i had a boyfriend, i love hearing all the cute things couples do for eachother on this day..probalby cuz someday i'll actually get to experience it as well. So today i've decided i'm in need of a change. I've sorta gotten into that rut that is arroused from the Winter Blues. I'm not happy with myself at all anymore and I really hate to say that. I feel like i've changed so much and it was for the worse. I've been unhappy with my appearance, how i treat people, and how people treat me. One minute someone treats and acts like they like and respect me and the next i'm a hastle and just all around second choice. It really hurts and i can't seem to get over it. I wish my confidence wouldnt boost the way it was last year. I dont wanna feel down on myself and i dont wanna be high on myself either. So I think i'm going to reboot my style (it's way overdue), try and bring back the old nice me and stop being a bitchy girl that i thought i would never become (sorry to those who got the brunt of that) and start clear. Hey, it's my senior year and i have got some amazing friends, so why not live it up right?!

On a brighter note**I'm going to Chicago for two weekends in a row! YAY! in three days i go w/ molly and we are hanging otu there ALONE!! and then the following weekend is a DANCE COMPETITION!!!! we'll probably get our tooshes kicked. but oh well right!?

So to all..i love you! and have a very HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

Tomarrow is VALENTINE'S DAY!! I hate Valentine's Day though. It's a day for Hallmark to make money. Why have a day to express to someone you love them? that should be said EVERYDAY. But to all my friends, I love you EVERYDAY..not just on Valentine's Day. Perhaps i'm bitter because I don't have a Valentine..but whatever.

**Sorry about the complaining here...i'm just sick of this person talking about my friend/s and thinking it's ok... I have realized I am extremely aggitated with someone. They think they are like thirty notches higher than everyone else. I wish I had the guts to say "Your friggin no different than us..GET OVER YOURSELF!" but i'm to nice...unfortunetly. I dunno they just think that the world revolves around them and they are flawless and never make a friggin mistake. Not everyone is focused on you...GET THE PICTURE.

I'm done..thats my tirade (sp?) whatev. I hope everyone has a great day tomarrow.

Alright. So i haven't written in this thing in a while. I'm sitting in second hour EXTREMELY BORED! I have no motivation to write my paper, so i have decided against it. I feel like this week has been gruelingly slow. I have a dance competition on SUNDAY and i'm sorta nervous. It should be interesting. I hope we're ready. I feel like we can pull it off but there are some issues i see arising. I can't wait to go to Chicago in two weeks. Molly and I are going there for the weekend for her birthday. It will definatly be a BLAST! Just us two in a hotel, it's def gonna be a blast. Shopping, visiting hannah, relaxing..exactly what I need. I need a vacation from here so badly. I have more senioritis than i thought i would ever have. There is no desire inside of me to get up and go to school in the morning anymore. Normally if there is a boy i like or somethign then i would at least have a miniature reason to wanna come, but i dont even have that anymore. ARGH! But..we are almost done..and once we are done, i'll probably miss it :-/. I am so confused on waht to do about college now. I got into all the schools i applied to except NYU. I think this is good though because all in all, NYU probalby would not have been where i would want to be. There is no college life, it is just city. I am now stuck inbetween Michigan or Miami University of Ohio. They are both amazing schools and i just dont know what one to choose. HELP ME! **if you have any advice..i'd love it**

So i'm pretty excited. I'll be really busy the next couple of weekends. I have a dance competition this weekend, two college visits coming up, Chicago with Mols, the following weekend a dance competition in Chicago...AHH so hectic. lol. Oh well it will definatly speed up time :).

So i'm excited i'm going somewhere for springbreak. I'm just going with my parents, but that will be fun. A sort of final trip with them before i head off to college.

I want to be in my dance warmups......but i have a stupid business law trial thing. ARGH. i'm going to go
i've bored you long enough

peace,
Jillyn!

ITS NEW YEARS EVE! :) :) I am really excited. I wasn't feeling so good at the beginning of today, but I slept it off and am now super excited. I was too close to having to cancel my annual New Years Eve "party". It should definatly be fun with a tremendous turn out! I hope everyone is having a WONDERFUL break. I sure am. My cousin, Loree, left today and i'm pretty bummed. I wish we got to see eachother more often because whenever we're together it is always a blast. I hope everyone has an amazing new years! I need a resolution. I think it's going to be "dont lose sight of who i am, and dont get rapped up in things that i dont believe in. Also live life to the max, and be nice to everyone." cliche? yeah i know. maybe i'll add lose ten pounds but i dotn see me actually doing that.

love greatly,
and see you next year!!

Jillyn

I GOT ACCPETED TO U OF M! thank goodness. I needed another option. I dont want to make a decision though. TO much rides on it I feel.

AHHH Christmas is in two days!!! :) I absolutly LOVE Christmas. It is totally my favorite time of year! I love giving everyone everything i bought them and seeing the look on their faces. I of course am selfish too and love recieving gifts. lol. Wow christmas is amazing. I only hope that it snows so it can be a beautiful white christmas! :)

i need to wrap presents yet! uh oh. I better go do that! hehe

MERRY ALMOST CHRISTMAS

so I'm bored.

I am extremeLy excited for tonight. It is the Roxygen and groupies reunion!! I miss those guuys so much. We are going to Kirby and it should definalty be a blast. All the girls are going to wear black dresses and look all nice and pretty.

MERRY CHRISTMAS BREAK!

I absolutly love this time of year. NO matter what goes wrong the fact that it's Chritmas makes me really happy. So I keep thinking of new things I want for Christmas, which kinda blows considering everyone is already down with me. For instance:

1. The older Green Day album. I dont really like their new stuff.
2. BCBG stuff. I'm in love with it.
3. The Eminimem Encore CD (hopefully Karl will let me burn it)

So Dannielle Kaye talked to me today and she told me she is questioning still doing dance. I can't believe it. If she leaves, I dont know what I'll do. She is honostly my escape. Her and Rachel. Without them, I would probably not want to go to dance. For some reason i'm just not into it as much as I thought I would be. I LOVE YOU DANNIELLE AND I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING GOING ON!

I ate a bite of my brother's Quizno's sub. It was gross

..All I want for Christmas is YOU...


i'm taking a poll. What is a cooler theme....
a) Trash bash. Where you wear gross clothes and look like trailer trash
b) Pimps and Hoes...self explainatory.

please leave me your input and some comments :)
And to all my friends, i love you and am so thankful to have you in my life. You always brighten my day. I love you for that.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

So I was just denied admissions to NYU. I was really trying to think optimistically about it, but it's really hard. It has been my dream school for so long. I didn't really expect it to actually hurt this bad to not get in. I dont even really want to go to any other schools. I guess God just didn't see me there :(. So now I just dont feel good enough..and I dont like this feeling.